Intermission #47

1. It's like everything is telling me to leave this damned hospital.

Never mind that I might not be adequately equipped in terms of knowledge, skills or clinical judgment. Never mind that I'm leaving friends behind. Never mind that I'm stepping into unfamiliar grounds.

I just feel in my heart - with great conviction! - that this is not a place for me. I can't, for the life of me, see myself developing properly if I remain in this backwater place.

It's like all departments are hostile towards each other. There is no respect, no trust.

Let's not even get me started on how ancient the infrastructure, the facilities are.

And the mindset. Oh, God, let's not even go there!

Dear God, save me, for I am powerless to save myself.

2. Now that the elections are over, can we just move on?

So BN retains the government seat. Did they really cheat? Only God Knows. But they can't afford to be complacent anymore.

All I know is, I'm sick of racial politics, regardless of which side incited it. I'm sick of opening my FB newsfeed and seeing hate and accusations, back to back.

Everybody needs "UBAH". And I mean it as change for the better, no matter what your political ideologies or worldview.

...I don't know what to believe in anymore. It's easier to give up than to constantly seek for the truth, in today's graying world, where authenticity is difficult to ascertain, despite the many sources of information available at our disposal. Such irony!

How do you seek the truth when there is slander all around, when people deal in lies, and people act more emotionally than rationally?

Is ignorance bliss? I'm starting to think so.

So please, let's just put all this conflict aside. Stop acting childish. Man up and stop being such a sore loser. Remember that the helm of governance is actually an amanah, and God will question you in the Afterlife.

...And for God's sake, clean up all the flags and banners. They're an eyesore already!

Current Music: Taking Over Me - Lawson

Open Season in the Mountains

There will often come a time when we are stripped of our personal protection gear, to be held hostage or as an open target for others - more often than not, those people whom we are inferior to, and almost automatically cower in fear due to this vulnerability felt in their mere presence - to open fire at us, at least in the form of words. I say words, because "verbal abuse" would be too over the top, with no reflection over the true situation and, decidedly, very much unjust especially if said words are most deserving to the recipient. God Forbid notwithstanding!

Clinical exams are one thing, viva is another. Speaking from past experience in third year - not much, but sufficient to quote to prove one's point - as one stood with the examiner, it felt as if the rest of the ward melted away to a state of nothingness; a mere backdrop, and whatever sound, movements and hustling about faded to make room for the one who would decide if the student before him/her was competent and knowledgeable enough to pass and move on to the next stage. Although one may be able to still stand properly and tread away with a normal gait, these are no helpful indicators of the nervousness that permeated throughout one's internal milieu; indeed, tachypnoea, diaphoresis, tremor, pre-hypertensive blood pressure readings, chest pain, headaches, aberrant patterns on ECG, and some other deviation from the accepted standard of normalcy within the medical field may very well manifest themselves.

A form of adrenaline rush that had never failed to knock one over regardless of his or her own preparation prior to the event.

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