Thus Far (...not to be mistaken for "Homesick")

"The future, according to some scientists, will be exactly like the past, only far more expensive" ~ John Sladek

Yes, I am done with my previous O&G posting, and presently in another - Paediatrics.
I like O&G. I do, albeit sort of a different kind of 'like' as compared to Internal Medicine. Sure, some of the nurses gave a whole new meaning to "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorn'd", but still...some human beings are not worth all the fuss.

What about paeds?

A precaution for those who have problems with reading my rants and complaints - You know what ensues next in this entry, so run for cover or, more simply, go visit some other webpage.

Well, I rather have a problem with the too much travelling part. For those who may like a little more useless info to add to your knowledge on geography, the distance between Kuantan & Temerloh is a around 130km. In terms of time, with an average speed of 120km/hr (...ignore the fact that the speed limit is 110km/hr while you're at it), I took around 1 hour 40 minutes - traffic can be a nuisance! - and in terms of cost, around RM23.50.
Don't get me wrong - I like travelling. I like driving. I just don't like the tiredness that comes later.
And staying in a house is not too bad - if you can tolerate a bit of messiness here and there, a not-so-reliable water supply in a particular lathrine, and a kitchen sink that is outside, for the whole world to witness your prowess at washing dishes!!
I don't even care about the television set - only two channels that provide the least strain to one's eyes...because I'd rather be attending to my laptop and my story book.
And why on Earth do we students have punch cards??
...I'll end my complaints here.

What I do appreciate is the hearty breakfast at the hospital, and the not-so-hectic ambience.

But I do miss my old roommates.
I do miss the Internet connection, however lousy it is.
...I want to go home.

Yesterday I was just saying to a classmate about how dull it is to be staying here, away from home. He suggested doing several things, one of them shopping. To which I replied, "I would, if money wasn't an issue".
Sometimes the urge to buy something stems out from a false sense of power of procuring something new, to claim it as your own, to add to your own collection of a myriad of odds and ends. Dangerously though, it can also result in the notorious feeling of superciliousness.
I don't think I have any problem labelled as "impulse buying". If anything, it's the indecisiveness of "To buy, or not to buy".

One problem of not buying early enough is "It may not be around anymore after this, so I must get it now!". Another is "The price might be higher the next time around! That's why it has to be now!". A real-life example of this latter dilemma: A pentorch that cost RM10 previously, just over 6 months ago, is now RM13.
The "Say No to Shopping!" logic only has these to say:
"You already owned one!"
"Save money! Don't you know there's an economy crisis going on as we speak?"
"...Temptation is evil. Enough said."
"You don't need to get that."
"Dude, you seriously don't need that. I'm tellin' you for real."

What brought this on? Oh, just the dilemma of categorising "Camera" as a necessity or a luxury (which has a high probability of being misused).

Some things can wait - like a new PDA, a new phone, or a new mp3 player. This doesn't stop me from keeping my eyes glued on the 'candidates' though.
...Is the motivation of "I'll buy them myself, with the money that I earn myself!" be enough to set me into studious mode?

Materialism is evil, my friend. So is laziness. Which is the lesser of the two evils?
...I admit defeat. Where's my white flag?

Current Music: Disturbia - Rihanna

P/s: Is it just me, or has Squall lost weight in Dissidia: Final Fantasy?

awakening

Like a splash of cold water straight to the face, drenching me wet, and goosebumps all over.
But I handled it quite well, if I could say so myself. A proof of maturity, perhaps?
Perhaps I should have more faith in my instincts. And in my fellow friends.
With it, I've gathered more strength to face the unknown, and the obscure.
For now, I can only offer my heartiest gratitude.

On the side note, I've finished downloading all 13 episodes of Amatsuki. Already done with five episodes, and let's just say the show earned my approval.

Current Music: Double Action - Suzumura Ken'ichi & Satou Takeru

Tainted with Blood

There's a sense of indescribable pain that appears to be stabbing my chest each time I see any news related to the present war in Gaza.
Buildings reduced to mere rubbles and dust, roads cracked and bodies lifeless, stained with blood and wounds. The sight of faces - so human, yet some held determination, some apathetic, others wet by tears. There were also those who could only break down as they witness the departure of their loved ones with their own two eyes.
It's like there is no more trace of humanity in the area, and I'm not just blaming Israel.
Sure, they're at fault for overdoing it. So far, 919 Palestinians killed, and Israeli? They're only down by two digits.
If Hamas is really using human shields, then they're as dirty as those Israel scums. Don't give me any excuse saying that it's out of desperation.
The two sides should just forget about ego.
It's no longer a question of who started it, who is right and who's wrong, and who should stop all this fighting first.
Likewise, the religious undertone is overshadowed by the humanitarian aspect of it all.
Perhaps the only way to cease this madness is to put all their weapons to ruins, and see if both parties would want to continue the bickering using their fists alone.
Oh, by the way, if the U.S. is still wondering where the heck are those alleged WMD that they've been looking for that they had to bomb Iraq to force themselves into the country, I think they'd better look in Israel instead.

I can only sympathise with those who support Israel's move in the war. You poor, poor creatures, blinded by your own ignorance, stupidity and misplaced compassion.

There'll be a continuation to this one day, when my threshold is exceeded, as what has happened today.

Current Music: Ghost Love Score - Nightwish

Filler entry

Indeed. I should just enjoy what little time I have during this break.
Such enjoyment includes immersing myself in pages and pages of Skip Beat! manga, which is relatively more entertaining than the anime version. And this is coming from someone who usually avoids shoujo's like plague.
I am totally shipping RenxKyoko! Finally, a female lead that doesn't bug me!
As for the list that I've compiled earlier - after some adjustments, only Kuroshitsuji and Hakushaku to Yousei are left after the rest are cancelled out. And, the newest addition to it would be Amatsuki. Makes me regret it for not buying it when I had the chance...

Current Music: Speed of Flow - The Rodeo Carburettor

Looking Within

Until now, I've always wondered if I would ever find salvation within me.

Is it right to grumble and complain when what I thought should be mine was grabbed away from me at the end of the day? Or should I point to my own inability to be a little more proactive in trying to create my own future, rather than playing safe by being a mere spectator, sitting by the sidelines and hoping against hope that the ball will end up in my field sooner or later?
Perhaps my own "values" is at fault. Perhaps I'm too stringent in having things my way rather than dabbling with danger a bit here and there. My "high-risk behaviour" is decidedly misplaced.

Of course, I am glad that good things that I'd like for myself happen to my friends. Besides, God granted them that Himself, who am I question?

My only consolation is the assurance that perhaps my time has yet to come.

And that the best thing for me now is what I already own thus far.

Am I even worthy of those?

Is it right to claim loss when I have not even owned it in the first place?

If I'm feeling all right, why do I still get sore from this pain?

Even when I want to run away from everything, there is something that pulls me back and binds me to where I started.

Is it okay to just dream? Or will it only tear whatever is left of me to shreds?

Current Music: No Air (Future Residents Remix) - Jordin Sparks featuring Chris Brown

P/s: Kazoku e, tadaima.