Looking Within

Until now, I've always wondered if I would ever find salvation within me.

Is it right to grumble and complain when what I thought should be mine was grabbed away from me at the end of the day? Or should I point to my own inability to be a little more proactive in trying to create my own future, rather than playing safe by being a mere spectator, sitting by the sidelines and hoping against hope that the ball will end up in my field sooner or later?
Perhaps my own "values" is at fault. Perhaps I'm too stringent in having things my way rather than dabbling with danger a bit here and there. My "high-risk behaviour" is decidedly misplaced.

Of course, I am glad that good things that I'd like for myself happen to my friends. Besides, God granted them that Himself, who am I question?

My only consolation is the assurance that perhaps my time has yet to come.

And that the best thing for me now is what I already own thus far.

Am I even worthy of those?

Is it right to claim loss when I have not even owned it in the first place?

If I'm feeling all right, why do I still get sore from this pain?

Even when I want to run away from everything, there is something that pulls me back and binds me to where I started.

Is it okay to just dream? Or will it only tear whatever is left of me to shreds?

Current Music: No Air (Future Residents Remix) - Jordin Sparks featuring Chris Brown

P/s: Kazoku e, tadaima.