- glorified secretary
- scapegoat
- sacrificial lamb
- punching bag
- puppet
- labourer
- pinata
Where is the glory, you ask? I'm still searching for the light, but it seems to be getting dimmer by the moment...
2. At certain times, it feels like even my body is against me.
That feeling of uselessness leaves an empty vortex, and it sucks whatever iota of hope that tried to stubbornly shine through. The seething anger towards others shakes every inch of my being. That anger towards self claws violently at something in my chest - My heart? My conscience? My soul - while all the stress gnaws at my stomach.
And somehow it's like the body is trying to purge me of all this toxic things by inducing nausea. There is the danger of rejecting food, and even sweet chocolate tastes bitter in my mouth.
My thoughts roam too far and too near for comfort. Colourful words that would make even sailors blush, and dark, dangerous imagination run wild without restraint. My dreams are bleak, and I wake up feeling more drained.
I'm afraid of going to sleep. There is no logic, no self-control to keep things in check, and I'm afraid if the nightmares will swallow me whole...and I never wake up.
