Fe

Fe
the chemical element iron

Iron
1 a strong, hard magnetic silvery-gray metal, the chemical element of atomic number 26...

Irony
adj of or like iron
noun the expression of one's meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect
- a state of affairs or an event that seems deliberately contrary to what one expects and is often amusing as a result
---Oxford American Dictionary

And thus, from the above collation, Fe is the element to describe my life.
While my minitest II results is yet to be out, judging from my emotional state and how I responded to the paper in what could be one of the longest one hour of my life (possibly due to my lack of confident answers...), these are my laws lest history repeats itself (be it in exams or other matters) and pummel my subconscious self (and my self-esteem along with it) to subsea levels...
1. Don't _ever_ discuss _anything_ before the paper - Paranoia is bad news
2. Don't work _too_ hard - Over-exerting thyself leaves exhaustion for the real feat
3. Anticipate, but don't hope or play 'spot the question' - because when I try to become optimistic, reality falls on me like stone rain
4. Never expect others to conform to your expectations, nor should you hope for their sympathy - Trust me, it rarely works.
5. Let it go - If it is meant to be yours, then God will grant it for you
6. Give and take - It is true, but not necessarily in the simplest of ways
7. Avoid regret
8. Over-confidence is evil
9. Correct timing is imperative
10. Believe in Heaven

Current Music: Time's Scar

How Normal is Normal?

Got a psychological case for our PBL for this week. A case of a drug-abuser (or, if you'd rather have a 'milder' description of it, call it 'substance abuser'...) who was caught committing multiple crimes and, as it turned out, is actually anti-social.
The fact that I could not reach the diagnosis early (aside from the fact that we learnt too little of psychology to _see_ it as a personality disorder...and name it with unbeatable accuracy) is that I saw it as normal.

Yes, to my perception, beating up one's own mother and stealing her jewelry for money (to buy drugs and alcohol) is perfectly normal, as far as criminal minds go.

That is to say, people with strong superego and subdued id should not go beat their mothers and take their belongings, whether they're wealthy or not.

I blame my utter inhuman take on humans on the news and crappy dramas.

Take it this way: Revenge is perfectly normal. Take old Cantonese movies for example (no offence, please! Some of them are really entertaining compared to sappy soap operas...). One plot that comes to mind (although, I wonder if it was really from a Cantonese movie/drama...) is how a student seeks to avenge his master's death. Yup, and as the show proceeds, you, as the audience, are slowly hypnotised to support this noble cause of the hero's. Forget about forgiveness.

No, I'm not exhibiting any anti-social tendencies!

I admit that I'm so sick of the human race. Well, not humans per se, but more to their stupidity and lack of conscience. I mean, okay, so they say emotions develop first (since the cerebrum - our thinking sphere, so to speak...develops later than our hindbrain) but that's still no reason for humans to act merely by following their emotions!

So why on Earth am I in this course? One that is supposed to be for the greater good of the people?

Truth is, I don't know. I like doing people-related stuff, but I dislike a good deal of people. I find close relationships to be rather suffocating, but still, my innate predisposition (...rather, it's in almost everyone) calls out for socialising. When I say relationship, I'm not only narrowing it down to non-platonic ones, mind you. Why else would you think I find Friendster absolutely restraining?

I still take risks. I still go against what I should not be doing. Is that the rebel in me trying to take control?

They say medical students are most susceptible to mental or personality disorders. It's common to have one or two from a batch of students coming down with a disorder in the course of their studies or, even, way after graduating. I suppose all this stress is bottled up and just when you can't take it anymore, it explodes like the Krakatao.

People are people. They do things for their own benefit, just like you for your own. And when I rebel against something, it's usually because I see that my rights are being violated.

Then again, everyone wants his or her own rights, forgetting the responsibility that comes with it.

But partially, it's human! See the Iraqis...They want to kick the intruders out because it's their country. They saw that enough damage has been done, so why don't the army just pack up and leave before they bomb the country to bits and pieces?

Simple answer. The invaders want the country itself.

Taking it on a more universal level, it's human to want something in return for a good deed one has done for others. Yeah, there's God's pleasure to be content with but please, seriously...We rarely feel content without wanting something good that we can see/feel immediately in return.

In other words...If you give someone something, you expect to get something that's worth the same value at one point or another.

Maybe it's just me. I believe in justice...but I guess my timing is all wrong. God is Just.

Compared to His, ours is nothing.

We can't always have our way. This ain't Heaven, for God's sake.

Current Music: The Meaning of Peace - BoA & Koda Kumi

Whee, going back for the weekend. Need to go shopping for several stuff (which are, however trivial they may seem to appear, essential for my current condition and, unfortunately, are not available in this measly part of the world). I wonder if I'll get to watch Death Note - knowing my high standards, I might end up feeling disappointed. I actually did with Da Vinci Code (perhaps, being me, the highest enjoyment was because it was a book rather than in the form of a movie).
And I need to get off of this Bleach marathon! I watched five (or was it six? I lost count...) episodes last night, four on the night before, and four before that.
Funnily, I can actually tolerate Inoue more than Haruno Sakura of Naruto, despite her assets being more of a fanservice than Sakura can ever be/achieve. And I'm actually okay with the idea of IshidaxInoue...!

Anyway, a checklist on the songs that I need to get:
1. Houki boushi (Bleach 3rd ED)
2. Arigatou (I might get the name wrong, but it's Bleach 2nd ED)
3. D-technolife (tv-version)

Moreover, I wish a messy, most painful, most undignified, most tortuous death to virus/trojans/worms/spywares/other malicious programmes on the globe, and on the Net.
I'm using the computer in one of the computer labs in campus, and it just detected a worm called VB.AGQ. Thank Heavens I didn't plug Mika in.